Change of Plans

Well i did EVERYTHING humanly possible to try and make things work out with Aaron unfortunately he did not. Things were going good for the first couple of weeks....Then He started contact with her again and started seeing her again and then Sunday December 9Th it ended. I knew in my heart that he was seeing her again and i went to go talk to him about it...lo and behold she was there with him. That was it i got my answer that i had been praying for for months. I know in my heart that had he given it his all we could have worked things out and been pretty happy and probably spent the rest of our lives together as a happy loving couple/family. But that's not what will happen. Surprisingly when i found out he was with her again i was not angry or sad when things ended. It was actually one of the best days I've had. I went that evening and got my patriartical blessing which has been such a comfort and a blessing to me...i know that i got it on that day for a specific reason...had i gotten it any day earlier it would have been so different and probably not ment so much. It was such a great testament to me that our father in heaven truly knows our thoughts our dreams our hopes our wishes our deepest fears he knows us better than we know ourselves and he loves us and he wants to see us succeed and be happy. I know without a shadow of a doubt that someday in hopefully the near future..like within the next 5 years :) i will get married again and have more kids. But most importantly it will be with a guy who will truly love me and treat me like the princess that i deserve to be treated like and will take me through the temple. I will have the life that i have always dreamed about. I will be happy and successful in life. I won't have to deal with the drinking and partying and tattoos and all the MANY MANY problems that i would have to face with Aaron. I will have a fulfilling life...he on the other hand will still have no education, dead end job, out partying and having lots of different girlfriends...trying to achieve happiness that as long as he is on the path he is on he will never truly achieve...he may think that he's truly happy right now but he won't be eternally happy like i will. I wish him all the best of luck in life and i hope that he turns around he becomes the stand up guy that these kids deserve to see and have. I will not replace him with another father for them...no one with every replace him but i will find someone who will be a role model for them and show them true values and morals that will help them through life. In a few weeks i will be breaking devastating news to him that will change our lives for forever. It breaks my heart because i have been looking at it through his point of view and if he did what I'm about to do to him i would be absolutely devastated as hard as it will be i know that it will be the best thing for me and the kids so that we will be able to move on and be happy.